We Are Thankful For Boca Raton’s Elitism, Self-Entitlement, And Love For Scandal

We Are Thankful For The Self-Absorbed, The Criminals, A Governor Who Seemingly Killed His Constituents, And All The Things That Make Boca, Well, Boca!

BY: ANDREW COLTON | Editor and Publisher

BOCA RATON, FL (BocaNewsNow.com) (Copyright © 2023 MetroDesk Media, LLC) — We wanted to take a quick moment to share a very BocaNewsNow.com Thanksgiving message. While other sites and businesses send sappy messages about their thanks for everything, we wanted to share our non-traditional thanks to all who make Boca Raton, well, Boca Raton.

Thank you self-absorbed elitists who bring dogs into stores and park on curbs. Photos of you lying your way through life with “service animal” collars that you purchased on Amazon continue to keep our readers reading. Photos of drivers who think it’s okay to simultaneously park on sidewalks and streets bring sunshine to a rainy day. And when you have a New York license plate, it only adds to the love. The normal people who live here thank you for providing them with laughs, with eye rolls, and proof that there’s a whole population in South Palm Beach County that just doesn’t get it. You truly make Boca Raton into Boca Rudeton! And we couldn’t be more thankful.

Thank you Ron DeSantis for killing your own constituents — and probably your presidential ambitions — by promoting false information about COVID-19. Remember when the Governor supported vaccines for like 3 minutes at Kings Point in Delray Beach? Could you imagine what his poll numbers would look like now if he stuck with it — if he supported vaccines, masks, and social distancing?! Wait, we know how many more Florida voters there would be! 91,178!

Thank you alleged drunk drivers, thank you alleged criminals! Without you, we wouldn’t be able to show just how busy our local police officers and deputies are, keeping the streets safe for the rest of us who don’t drink and drive, who don’t physically attack people, who don’t commit crimes, and who actually give a damn about others. And thank you, lawyers, who occasionally send us messages “demanding” that we take down a report of an arrest of someone who blew a .224 while doing 80 on Jog Road while kids walk to school — “cause the cops don’t know what they’re talking about and you made it all up.” We are thankful that the legal system provides for an aggressive defense.

Thank you police departments who believe it’s okay to shoot people, then withhold names of cops by claiming they were the victims under Marsy’s Law! Sure, it hasn’t happened in over a year, but you know who you are. We are all for creative lawyering and writing, so anytime someone with a badge can critically injure someone, then hide their identity behind a law designed to protect rape victims, we applaud the effort. Thank you! (And more importantly, thank you to the police departments that do not hide when something happens. To you, we give our respect).

Thank you Palm Beach Post and Sun Sentinel for constantly showing us that the old news business model doesn’t work! Why do you both spend so much time and space covering national news? Do you really think that the news audience in South Florida needs you to report national stories on your front page? That info is always keystrokes away by national news teams that do it better and faster. How about sticking to local news, like we do? Out of the three of us, one is really successful. Guess which one?! We’re thankful that you constantly remind us that we’re doing it right…

Thank you rogue HOA boards that are constantly surprised by a little thing called Florida Statute 119! That’s the law that makes pretty much anything filed with the State of Florida public information. When you say one thing and do something else, then file it, you gotta assume it’s going to get out there. We thank you, rogue boards in Boca Raton, Delray Beach, and Boynton Beach, for giving us something to investigate and research.

Thank you to all of you who have threatened to sue us for “desecration,” “defecation,” “dereliction,” “defection,” and “dissection” of character. No, we are not kidding. We receive threats on an almost daily basis from people who are threatening to sue for things we just don’t do. At least in public. (For those playing at home, the word these people are looking for is “defamation.” We don’t do that, either).

Thank you Kings Point! Who knew that a senior living community in South Palm Beach County could be so full of people who are arrested, that we’d actually have to create a competition to see if more people could be arrested in 2023 than in 2022. Just a few weeks left. We’re down by one. Could it happen!?

And most importantly, thank you BocaNewsNow.com readers. You have made BocaNewsNow.com one of the most read, most successful hyper-local news websites in the United States. We have an audience that other forms of media can’t reach. Our advertisers find success with us that they can’t find with other outlets. We have a relationship with our readers that hasn’t existed since true local newspapers went out of business. And we thank you, our readers, for always reaching out. Your compliments, your criticisms, your complaints. We appreciate the time it takes to send a note or make a phone call, and we are humbled that you care enough to do so. We are thankful for you.

Please have the Thanksgiving that you want to have, with the people you want to have it with. And if you happen to see your neighbor being arrested down the street, we’d be thankful if you’d snap a few pics, then call or text 561-576-NEWS. Happy Thanksgiving!